Half Marathon

Well, I started Saturday at 5:45am and had a quick breakfast. I met Thoele and we went to the Fargodome. I was wearing a sleeveless outer armour shirt and my tri-shorts, which doesn't provide for good insulation against 45 degree weather....I was really cold. It even rained for a couple minutes while everyone was lining up. Fortunately, the supposed 5700 bodies kept the wind off me while I was waiting.

The first few miles felt great. There was plenty of people watching to keep the eyes busy, and I even ran into a few people I knew.

As the crowd thinned out, I just kept my pace, and enjoyed the views around town. There was also plenty of spectators cheering -- these people had way more enthusiasm than the people at the finish line in the fargodome.

There were plenty of people who had water/gatorade cups along the way in addition to the race sanctioned stations, so I wasn't too surprised to see an old philanthropic acquiantence, Erik Hatch, holding out drinks for the runners around mile 10. Knowing him, I should've known that he'd be holding out cups of beer for the runners. I had a few sips anyways.

I finished the race 1:48:02, a little short of my guesstimated goal of 1:40:00, but I was satisfied to have finished without breaking stride. Right now, the race results say I placed 44/124 in my age group.

Then I helped Tim move the last of his stuff out of his apartment. *tear* He's all grown up. We then had Q'doba. Then I supported him as he took a last walk down the halls of his former employer--Happy Harry's. He picked me out a few decent wines and got me his employee discount, even though he doesn't work there anymore.

I met a big group of great people at Outback for drinks, and had a very mediocre steak, and then was invited over to the Mariners' house, who were grilling some of the biggest steaks I've ever seen. It's quite possible they were frankenstiened together from several cows. I wasn't hungry at first, but the beer I was drinking gave me a little appetite, and I had a small chunk of steak, some of Joanie's kickass cheesybread, and some asparagus. (sidenote: doesn't asparagus just taste way better when you've got a few drinks in you?)

Afterwards, we played trivia at TGI Fridays, where I, of course, dominated (that is, when I was paying attention.) Then we went to Dempsey's, the new Irish pub on broadway. I commandeered a large booth, and sat in the middle, and some very good looking people filled in on both sides.

People couldn't help but stare.

The evening ended with deep discussion over coffee and breakfast at Perkins-- the way any great day in Fargo ends.

A few random notes from the weekend...

While having a nice evening run around the lakes, it's possible that all the chicks looking at you are attracted to you. It's even more possible that you have a ton of gnats stuck to your face.

The best part of my weekend was Wade and Erin testifying to my father that my hair is awesome. (My dad's straightfaced response: "Nope")

Note to all random gay men: I am no longer flattered by your come-ons, which have completely lost their novelty. Please cease and desist.

Isn't it ironic that Red Delicious apples are completely not delicious? To swap in some truth to their descriptive moniker, I would suggest tank-armor-peeled Red Grainy Blands. Seriously. They've got to be at least 50 peel by weight, and the inside of those damn things has the texture of couscous. Blech.

If you can't walk straight, it's completely unnecessary to buy a bottle of gin on offsale.

I learned this weekend that my Dad's cousin has a guest room in his house that I'm welcome to stay in at any time. He also has a pool. He also lives on Oahu.

In all the combinations and permutations that can be possibly made using all alcohol & mixers, Tequila and Tonic is perhaps the worst concoction that can possibly be made.

Golden Idea: A sweet trash TV reality show could center around the lives of security guards at wedding receptions. If you feel bad about your life, you definately wouldn't after witnessing the meaningless of their existence.

If you chip in for Pizza Patrol at a late night house party in Fargo, don't leave the kitchen until it shows up. If you do, your share will probably be eaten by some obese roadie for an 80's hair metal cover band crashing the party.

Basic Bicycle Maintenance...

If you ever need a pedal wrench, don't buy one. I already did, and it was in a fit of rage.

I'll let you borrow mine.

A few weeks ago, I bought some new pedals & cycling shoes(the most expensive shoes I've EVER bought) and was VERY excited to take a ride with them on that very sunny & warm spring day ...

I carefully installed the cleats onto my shoes, and got out my toolset to take the old pedals off my bike. I grabbed my crescent wrench with my muscled arm in the same fashion my father, grandfather, and great-grandfather have been doing for the last 110 years.

I yanked. And yanked on that motherfucker until I rounded off part of the nut on the pedal. "Ah, SHIT!" I yelled as I wiped the beading sweat from my brow. I deduced the thread was seized, so I sprayed some WD40 on the threads and waited anxiously for a half hour as the daylight burned away....

I tried again, this time on a different orientation to the smashed hardened Chrome-Molybdenum steel on my first try. I looked at my hand, which had the reddest & deepest indentation I've ever seen on flesh. No more screwing around. I can get some ice later.

I close my eyes and mustered every last sodium-potassium receptor in my left bicep, deltoid, and lat. I feel the wrench move abruptly.........because I broke the wrench.

Our hero spreads his arms, fists clenched, teeth bared and looks to the sky/ceiling while emitting a primal roar.

I come to consciousness in my car headed toward the nearest bike shop, Erik's in St. Louis Park, to get a pedal wrench and slap down $30. Yes. I paid $30---a satisfying evening at the Herkimer.....for one wrench. This wrench has a slot to grasp the pedal nut, and a long handle. That's it.

I got home and pulled the wrench from it's bag. Which....appeared to have directions on the back.

Huh....the left pedal has a reverse thread.

Oh.


I had a good ride.

1st Try

I just completed my first triathlon of 2006. Sort of.

I just participated in Lifetime's first annual Indoor Triathlon. Now, something this insipid doesn't really count given that I got into triathlon because I loathe treadmills, but I figure I could chalk it up as a decent workout.

10 minutes pool swim
30 minutes on a stationary spin bike (all bikes set to the same resistance)
20 minutes on a treadmill. (2 degree incline)
Everyone was scored on the distance the completed in each leg.

I got to Lifetime only to realize I forgot my goggles, so I had to buy a crappy pair at their overpriced sporting goods shop for $15.

I thought I swam ok, got up to the cycling studio only to find out the girl next to me swam EXACTLY THE SAME DISTANCE. Fuck. Well, I kept talking to her and found out that she's a professionsal swim coach, and swam for Minot (ND) High School--a phenomenal swim team, hands down. Well, maybe I didn't do so bad, but she is a girl.

The guy cycling on the other side of me is fucking cruising. His pedal cadence was probably around 125-130 easy--which means your shoes are a blurry white(or whatever color your shoe is) circle. I'm going at a decent clip relative to him, and all the Lifetime employees were sure that he was going to beat the day's record by a mile. He goes 17.5 miles, I hit 16.4....which was also really fast for the day, according to the proctors.

The run was painful. They made you set an incline to replicate running outdoors, but I think everyone agreed it was more difficult. I ended up hitting 2.46 miles which was an attempt to best my last tri's run pace. I would've run faster given the views of Lake Harriet instead of stupid R&B videos on the TV. I a nice consolation would've been some some nice-heinied(sp?) women running in the treadmills in front of me.

I spent a good 30 minutes in the hot tub afterwards, and now I'm relaxing with a Summit Maibock and listening to some all-encompassingly kickass music. (thanks J-Mo)

This is the way Sundays should go.


UPDATE: I took 2nd place in points.