Monday, August 22, 2005

Andrew is......

Directions: Type "(your name) is" with the quotes, into a Google search then pick out your favorite 10 responses. Copy, then repost your responses:

1. Andrew is a loony · He hasn't slept in something like 48 hours now. He's a loony.

2. Andrew is one of the most coolest skateboarders in the world, He rocks.

3. now that mr.pants is gone, andrew is the funniest fucker alive. The ultimate
representation of beauty.

4.Andrew is considered to be the living Buddha and is treated that way by his constituents. I saw them collect $1000 for a vase to put flowers in for him. He owns a Volvo Turbo R sports car and other high priced things. He's an effete snob. He is waited on hand and foot like royalty by his students. He is fed like a king and they give him every wish. It's disgusting to watch.

5. Andrew is also serious about inventing and says he is continuously inspired, and at times, he claims to have seen his ideas materialise some years later. One such idea was a new design for an ice cube tray that allows you to release one cube at a time; which he says is now manufactured by a large company. His ideas are often laced with humour, for example, the "single-handed page turner for reading Playboy!"

6. Andrew is basically a perfect creature - he's an angel

7. Andrew is a would-be actor (he played a retarded quarterback on a made-for-cable movie)

8. Andrew is the musical equivalent of cotton candy: it's great to eat once in a while and tastes sugary-sweet going down, but you shouldn't eat too much of it, since it's all mostly fluff.

9. Andrew is quickly seduced by the power of evil...Andrew is introduced to us as a morally ambiguous ‘evil genius’

10. Andrew is all riled up, I suppose he's going to take his balls and go home.

I'm pretty sure ..3 is my favorite. It scores a 10 on the "what the fuck?" scale.

Friday, August 5, 2005

Eye Candy

I'm a very spacial thinker, which explains my infatuation with maps. Now, I'm sure that most of this obsession is rooted in the fact that I'm very poorly travelled. I have lived 13/50ths of a century, but have never crossed an ocean. Sad. So I compensate by exploring the world via paper drawings and daydreaming.

Road maps, Political/geographical maps, neighborhood maps, and even cardiovascular system diagrams; my world atlas is to my eyes what....well, boobs & hiked up skirts are to my eyes.

But, the ne plus ultra of all maps has arisen from the megalomaniacs at! Realtime panning & zooming are only a mouseclick away! But this is no ordinary online roadmap like mapquest, et al. Not only can I get conveniently get directions from this pot of gold, but I can just as easily see a satellite photo! I can actually see where I want to go--but not necessarily across town. For the most part, the entire US & UK, and Japan have detailed satellite photos in addition to the roadmaps. And most of the world has satellite photos visible. I can see it all....on friday, I went to washington square park, Tokyo(ckeck out the road map), my parent's house, Sydney, South Beach, downtown Minny, Oslo, Venice, and my apartment, all from the comfort of my cubicle.

But wait! There's more. When I'm finished looking at every last obscure city, landmark, mountain range & nude beach on earth, I can now start all over on the moon! That's right.